Danger Land

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Hello and welcome to Danger Land!
Are you tired of the outside world crumbling around you?
Do you want to leave your boring, old, stupid, not cool, dumb, tasteless... life?
Do you have a death wish?
Well then, Danger Land is the resort for you! Full of danger out to 50 miles away from the island!
Reserve your tickets to this death trap now by calling 1-800-445-DEAD!